Monday, January 16, 2012

A strange relation

                "Chris is he alright?" I find myself panicking.
                "Hey, I think you should meet him. He's been asking about you." Chris had a look of amazement and curiosity.
                 I entered the room to see him propped up against a pillow. He was visibly in a better shape but boredom was written on his face.
                "Hey.. how are you feeling?" I tried to open up a conversation.
                 If he felt anything, he did not express it. "Ok.." was all he answered.
                 It was getting awkward. He did not seem interested to talk and neither did he look into my eyes while talking. I was getting desperate to ask him my questions but probably this wasn't the right time. I retreated back and was almost near the door when he called out,
                "Don't you want to talk to me?"
                "Erm.. I thought you didn't want to."
                 He did not say anything. I was not sure if I was supposed to leave or ask him.
                "Do you get dreams?" I knew I would sound idiotic if it wasn't what I thought.
                 He looked at me in rapt attention as if ready to absorb every sound coming from my voicebox.
                 I knew I had hit on the nerve.
                 "What do you see?" I probed.
                 "You." he answered. Although I was expecting him to say it, I was not ready to acknowledge it.
                 "And?" I asked further.
                 "Why don't you take a seat?" he asked me. I sat near his bed on visitor's chair.

                "Why don't we start with you?" he asked.
                I dreaded the moment. IT was difficult to explain a dream when you have grown up over the years perfecting watching it. The early vague dreams which later started getting nightmarish.. The  nights I woke up crying and couldn't explain why I felt the pain... The fear of going to sleep for the next few nights.. How could I sum it up for the one who has been the cause of it all.. Or was he?
                "The dream has been the same.. The frames keep changing.. I feel I m in a house.. I m on the terrace. Its an old villa but I feel at home. I sometimes feel a hand on my waist. I m filled with love. I walk down the stairs holding those hands which make me feel secure.. I walk a short distance outside the house and feel the grip on that hand loosening and then I have nothing...I m all alone.. It makes me void. Incomplete. I cannot think, I cannot speak. I feel trapped.. I suffocate."
                 The dream in itself wasn't so disturbing as the way I felt in those moments. I lived it! I look up at his face and I m touched to see the concern in his eyes. For years I have seen people brush it aside as a nightmare.. It felt strangely good to know that someone can experience the same pain..
                 "Have you seen anything like that?" I ask him.
                 "No.. My dreams aren't so clear.. What I do see is hurried images in front of me.. Sometimes I see you talking to me.. Sometimes I see us being close and I can feel that you are the only woman I belong to.. Sometimes I feel sheer pain at the memory.. I see you alone and I long to touch to you.. To comfort you but it breaks me to not be able to do that. I feel helpless.. My throat dries up as I try to call out to you.. I don't remember your name.. "  I feel an intense emotion building inside him.. He is much more disturbed than me.. Maybe because his dream lack clarity. He struggles to get hold of those visions but they move faster than he can understand them..
                  "Have you always seen me?" I know I m pushing him too much.
                  "No.. no.. I never saw you.. It was a blurred face and can you imagine how frustrating it was to me? The moment I saw you I found peace. Suddenly that face became you." he gave a weak smile..
                  " I never saw you.. I only felt you.. I could feel your arms, you hands but face... I couldn't see.. It was something vague.. I never understood why.. While the feelings and sensations were so clear, I couldn't hold you close or see you all I wanted to.. I had no idea until you asked about dreams yesterday.."
                    I sobbed. I didn't know what my grief was, just like in my dreams. Nevertheless I had a deep hurt that I needed to cry on. He did not make me feel weird. He held me close and comforted me. I sense that this gives him some kind of satisfaction. It lessens his grief, which he too is clueless about. I held on to him for sometime.
                    "Why did you come to my college and who are you?" I suddenly ask him. He laughs.
                    "Time for some formal introduction. I m Nabhanyu.. I was actually waiting for one of my contacts but seems like I was in the wrong place. He was giving me directions when destiny lead me to you.. I m from New York but shifted here for official purpose. What about you?"
                    " I m Naeema. I m from this very city.. " We kept talking for a long time and it now felt like we have known each other forever.. Maybe we did..
                    "I don't know if its love, but I cannot take my eyes off her." 
                    I blushed. Oh my God!! I hear his thoughts...
                    Nabhanyu- the eternal and Naeema was the blessed one..

Wednesday, January 11, 2012

A strange relation

                     Read Part 2 and Part 1
                     I decided I would go to see him after my lab work was done. I took a bus to go to college. The hospital fell on my way. When the bus halted right in front of the hospital I couldn't hold myself. I got down and walked into the hospital, not knowing who I was there to see.
                     The smell of disinfectant stung me the moment I set my foot in. Being a government hospital the out patient department was swarming. A very busy receptionist gave me a bored look on asking her several times.
                     "Madam aap kisko dekhne aayi hai? Naam toh pata hoga na?" (Madam who have you come to visit. You must be knowing the name right?" )
                     "Nahi, kal shaam ko admit hue hai.. Please zara dekhiye na." ( No, he got admitted last evening. Please check.")
                      I was uncomfortable there. I had never been to a hospital alone and pleading someone this way was beyond my nature. Still with the help of a ward boy I managed to locate the ward he was in. I heard the receptionist mutter "Kaha kaha se aajate hai". It was embarrassing.
                      He was in a ward on the second floor. I heaved a sigh of relief when I saw  Chris. He was the general secretary of our college and a very warm fellow. The hospital suddenly didn't look that gloomy.
                      "Hey Naeema, what are you doing here?" He looked surprised to see me.
                      "Chris, that guy who had an accident in our college.. how is he?"
                      "He is out of danger but he will require to be admitted for few more days. Once he becomes concious we can contact his family. His coming to conciousness is critical in the coming hours."
                       Chris was sweet and caring. He had stayed behind in hospital for a stranger all night.
                      "Chris go home and get some rest. I will stay for sometime." I told him
                      "Are you sure? I mean don't you have any class right now?" he enquired
                      "It's alright. I can manage."
                      "No Naeema, I will go once he gets concious. Any emergency might come up. I better not leave you alone here." he reasoned and  I couldn't oppose it.
                       We went into his room. His leg was plastered and his head bandaged. Tubes were inserted into his hands. That was not how I had seen him..
                       I couldn't see him anymore. I rushed out of the room and waited outside. I saw a doctor and a nurse rushing into the ward. Soon Chris came out.
                      "Naeema, come inside." he pulled me in.
                      The doctor was busy checking his pulse and eyes.
                      "Chris, now I can say he is completely safe. I have given him an injection. Get these medicines from the pharmacy downstairs and I will come on a round in an hour."
                      Those deep eyes kept looking at me. His eyes wouldn't leave me. I moved around in the ward and then with Chris outside and I could still feel his eyes on me. The nurse was still in the room and she gave me a look that could easily be read as "What's in her that he is watching so intently?" 
                       Chris left to fetch the medicines and the nurse soon took to her heels. I was now alone with Him.. I was at loss of words. I couldn't move as his gaze was fixed on me.
                       He murmured something. I tried to inch closer to him. Maybe he needed something and was too weak. I leaned closer to him to listen.
                       " I knew you would come."
                       I was numb. My tongue felt heavy as I asked, "You.. you know me?"
                      " I didn't.. But when I saw you crying yesterday, I did."
                      "What does that mean?"
                      "Do you believe in dreams?" he asked in a serious tone.
                      "You get them too?" I asked in astonishment. My life was changing.. He tried to talk some more but he was too dizzy. Perhaps the injection was making him so.
                       I called out to the nurse in the adjacent ward. She confirmed it was indeed the injection that had put him to sleep. She further added that patients do talk delusional things after coming out from such a condition. She stared longer at me but this time it was a comforting one. She asked me to not get troubled over what the patient might talk and left the room.
                      Before I could analyse what had just occurred in the room, Chris came back. He advised me to go home. There was a lot of inquiry to be done in this matter and I shouldn't get involved. I thanked him again for all the caring and left for home.
                    His thoughts left me disturbed. Nothing was going to be the same any more.
                    Later that night Misha texted me, "r u crazy? Why did u miss 2day's lab?" 
                    I knew I couldn't explain it to her and left it without replying back.
                    Still late into the night I got another SMS..
                    I didn't want to see it but still I reluctantly checked it. It was from Chris.
                    Naeema get yourself asap tomorrow morning to the hospital. 
                    I jumped out of the bed. Was he fine? Did he say anything? I thought of calling Chris but decided otherwise.
                    Sleep didn't come to me that night. I wanted morning to come soon.. The next day would answer my questions..

(to be continued)

Tuesday, January 10, 2012

A strange relation

                 I found myself running to the lawn. No sound, that I heard, made any sense to me. I knew I had to somehow ensure his safety. That's all that I cared. I could see some guys helping him on to a stretcher. Luckily the stretcher was available as a preparation for  the intercollegiate sports meet which was to happen the next day. They had made him lie on the stretcher and were busy informing the authorities.
                 I pushed through the crowd and tried to reach closer to him. He had an athletic built and was fair skinned. His complexion had turned pink as he was writhing in pain. His leg was hurt and his head was injured too. I winced. I could not bear to see him hurt. I don't know why and what conspired in those few minutes when he looked at me and smiled. That was the impression I couldn't get out of my mind. His pain and smile at one and the same time!
                 The ambulance reached within some time and they took him to the hospital. The crowd had started to disperse when someone placed a hand on my shoulder. I turned to see Misha there. She looked tensed and as her hand approached me I realised that she was wiping my tears. I had been crying!
                 "Don't worry, he'll be fine. Let's go home' she said to me. I followed her.
                 "Do you know what happened?" she asked me. I shook my head in disapproval.
                 "You know that tree just at the corner of the lawn? The one that was shaking madly today? It sort of clicked and fell. That guy was standing close to it. He moved back suddenly and dashed with a car. Can you imagine it? Hit by a car while trying to escape an unpruned tree. Poor fellow. He was destined to be hurt today."
                 "Where have they taken him?" I asked her.
                 " The hospital close to our college.. Umm yea Sarvodaya hospital."
                 "You know what's strange? That guy didn't have a single id. They have no idea whom to contact. No one knows who he is. Added to it, the tree isn't really part of our college. Its on BMC road so its supposed to be their fault. It could go on forever you know. The lady driving the car panicked! I guess she will have to be admitted too, that's how much shaken she was. Anyway it will be dealt by them. We got free early atleast." she added.
                 The mystery surrounding the guy was deepening now. There was something about him that seemed to pull me towards him. His perfectly shaped face, his deep black eyes with a thick brow arching it, his lips that broke into that mysterious smile, everything seemed to haunt me. I realised that I was still visualising him. How could he affect me so much? How could he get so harmed in the few seconds my sight left him?
                  I reached home. For a brief time I settled into the normal routine. Soon I had forgotten my earlier confusions and fell  off to sleep.
                  It was then that it happened. The dream that had disturbed me for years. I sat up sweating. Misha's words vibrated in my mind, "He was destined to be hurt today."
                  Then it all started making a weird sense. I wanted to see him again but now I HAD to see him.

Friday, January 6, 2012

A strange relation..

                      It was a regular day at college. The lectures that day were all boring. Just for the sake of attendance we had brought our lazy selves into the classroom. The lecturer was changing slides faster than we could open our eyes. The moment she saw one of the students paying the least attention she would get into her routine of reading the slides and make us more sleepy!
                     The first benchers were scribbling notes. The second row students were busy reading novels below their desks.

                     Misha was busy drafting a letter (rather a love letter) to her prince charming who was happily dozing off. Misha had set eyes on Rounak on the very first day of college. She had spent the entire semester deliberating whether to confess her feelings of let him guess. Rounak was the last person who would ever guess the meaning of her subdued and suppressed emotions behind her playful jokes and thoughtful SMSes.

                     Our classroom opened out to a lawn and half the class was lost looking at the final year guys who sat on the wooden benches on the other side of the lawn. They had left early it seemed. The girls were busy blushing and giggling at those guys.
                      The boys in our class seemed in a low spirit that day. A whole hour had gone by but no had started dropping their stuffs. The obvious childish hints the boys gave when they could no longer bear the constant slide reading!

                      This was the overall picture of the classroom I was in, occupying a seat between Misha and Reema. Reema, I thought, must have had a fight with her boyfriend. She was silent throughout and had lunch with us without even once excusing herself to attend a phone call that day. Misha was still writing her letter and quickly covered the book so that I couldn't get a peek at it. The last time I read it, she thought it was funny, I thought it was great. She felt I said that just because I write better than her. There was no point in arguing and I didn't bother to intrude her privacy there after.
                      An hour and a half later I kept staring at my watch to show 4.30 so that I could make a dash and catch my 5:05 local. Travelling in local trains had become a way of life and life depended on what train you caught.

                     This was one of the days when I wonder," what am I doing in a room full of idiots?" My friends were busy in their own worlds, I was fed up of giggling girls. I wanted to run away. I was praying I could just move out of the class somehow.
                     I looked out at the law, green and fresh in the month of October. Though its usually warm this time of the month, there was a little chill in the air. It looked as if the trees were dancing. I was jealous of the final year students who were out at the lawn.
                     That was when I saw him. Something about him seemed so much known and so much mine.. I was sure I had never seen him before in campus. He looked older but could he be one of the research students? I had no idea. He was busy talking on the phone and I was waiting for him to just turn around and face me fully so that I could see his face clearly. Why was I interested in seeing his face? Another question I had no answer to.

                       The immediate response I would have given to such a situation was to disturb Misha and ask her if she had seen him and she would have temporarily forgotten her preoccupation with Rounak and be as excited as if I asked her about her boyfriend!
                       But something about that day was strange. I kept looking at him for a some more minutes. Whne I was about to reach out to Misha, one of the giggling girls screamed out, "Nooooooooooo... Oh my God!!! Save him"

                       The whole class was startled. The lecturer seemed to have woken up from her meditation. Misha and Reema had a look of shock. As I looked outside the window, I could hear more screams. I tried to concentrate on the lawn and wondered where the guy went.. Then I saw him drenched in blood on the lawn...

(to be continued)            

P.S: sorry for being MIA for so long. Just lost the inspiration to write fiction. Although the entire story would be in first person narrative its entirely fiction. This was something I wrote in first year. Just found this today and got inspired to complete this story.. I will try my best to post regularly..